I use mindfulness to help me deal with the overwhelming stress and anxiety that I feel sometimes when living with Cancer.
Visualisation is a more mentally active type of meditation where I imagine my disease, and concentrate on shrinking and distroying it.
When I was first diagnosed I was able to see the tumours clearly on my scans. The radiologist was able to estimate their sizes, and I took a mental snaphot of the tumours in order to bring my fight mentally to them. My own mother had died from breast cancer a few years ago and I had just inherited her stone collection (she enjoyed collecting stones from places she’d visited and had her own stone polishing device which tumbled them to make them smooth and delightful to touch).
I was desperate to visualize my tumours in order to give myself the best chance of fighting them with my mental battle. One evening I discovered that the stones would make good representations of them. I could choose from all the sizes and I felt my mother’s presence when I chose each stone to represent each single tumour, and the handful of smaller ones to represent what looked like a plate of peas in my right upper lung.
Here are pictures of the stones as the treatment progressed. It was an exercise to help me picture the tumours clearly.
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